Kung Fu Chefs

Region: China
Year: 2010
My rating: 1 out of 10 (It would've been better if it hadn't been made)

I watched this because Vanness is in it. I was hoping to see something good with him in it, but this one is another strike. With Star Runner and the other one he was in (Kung Fu Fighter?), this makes a strike out.

It's painfully weak on comedy and pitifully weak with emotions. I don't think it's the fault of the actors, either--it just wasn't written into the script.

If you are a fan of cooking and love Iron Chef, maybe you'll like this, but you'd be better off just watching Iron Chef.

What I really want to see Vanness do is a romantic film. In the short shots in this film where he and the leading woman were hanging out, he was so sweet. And at the end, he is standing with the woman in a way that is deeply sexy. In his own music video, Never Let You Go, he is cute at first when he meets a girl and then he burns up the dance floor with his sexy, sick moves. He's got two great qualities--he's sweet and he's sexy.

Recently, he's been trying to create a more mature image with his devil snip of a beard on his chin and his boring hair cut. He is at least 10 times hotter with a clean-shaven face and styled, shiny shag hair like he was when he had on tour in 2007-2008. Tssss~hawt!

Vanness! Do a romantic film! You don't need to kick ass, just hug and play, and kiss a bit man!

Death Trance

Death Trance (2005)
Japan
Director: Shimomura Yuji
Starring: Tak Sakaguchi (who is the stunt coordinator himself)
Music: Dir En Grey, awesome industrial techno and choral instrumentals

He fights with his sheathed sword for most of the movie and still kicks ass.
He's got Captain Jack dreads, and drunken walking/fighting style
The real but not quite real space, exquisitely Japanese.
A mix of Kaidan and Samurai Deeper Kyo.

He is tied to the young girl
he's always hungry
she laughs when he fights
and he rushes to her when she cries, far away in the forest
she is connected with the goddess of destruction.
I think she's a complex for his innocence (she represents all of that energy in him) and he's a complex for her ability for destruction (he represents all of that energy in her). But I don't know. It's Japanese, and my psyche carries a lot of Western elements, so it's harder for me to get a bead on. What is it with Japanese lore and making the goddess of destruction female (and not in the Kali-changer-of-cycle sense, but in the oni eat-you-for-lunch kind of way)? What is it with Japanese stories and the guy warrior with a young girl on his shoulder or in tow? The land of kawaii and Amaterasu, the land that ejected the baby sun god Hiruko....well, whatever it is, I love it. I love that misty line that makes reality a dream and a dream reality.


The main character's dream life is deep and primeval, which made this movie extra special for me.
We get a glimpse of his true nature--he's an unawakened dark angel, an f'n akuma in the flesh. Who better to put the goddess of destruction back in her box than the Destroyer himself? This picture pinged and opened my dream core so fast, like 0 to 200 in a millisecond, do not pass go kind of feeling. It's the feeling of recognition.
There is another character in this film, a woman who reminds me of Trinity--the woman who is an amazing fighter, the woman who knows, and the woman who cares about what happens to the world. She's even got the smirk. Haha.
I was going to get up and get some ice cream, but this movie was so riveting in the right places (in that misty space between reality and dream) that I found myself watching the end credits roll before I got up again.

Kamui

Kamui
Actors: Matsuyama Kenichi, and (OMG I had no idea it was him even though he was in half of the movie) Ito Hideaki, Kato Koyuki (ice queen/spiteful woman role--when you see her in a film, you know there will be trouble coming from her), Anna Tsuhciya (where was she??), and Ekin Cheng (where was he??).


Plot (?) **Spoilers Follow**
Kamui disowns the shinobi way and escapes from the clan. Which is a no-no, so he'll have to watch his back for the rest of his life unless something miraculous happens. He winds up in the sea on a boat with a fisherman who tells him to hop off into the stormy sea. So he finds himself washed up on the island where the guy lives. Kamui learns to live like a fisherman but he stares off towards the sea, with a wandering eye. One of the young women on the island takes a liking to him, but it's hard to really feel the connection because she just shows up one day and gives him a very nice, symbolic sea shell. Pirates show up...and somehow, the are connected to Kamui's dark past. I make this thing sound like it has plot. It doesn't.

If you want continuity and depth, this movie ain't for you. If you want to see Kamui kick ass in a fairly grusome very absurd Japanese way, then this movie is for you. Kamui shows you protruding spines and projectile blood. They also go WWF on Great White Sharks.

It goes: Kamui runs, he does some awesome ninja stunts, he escapes. He sees a guy hack off the leg of the lord's horse. Next thing, he's in the ocean with the severed leg and the guy. Then he's washed up on the island. Then he's out there fishing. Then the fisherman is caught by the lord. Kamui goes with the fisherman's wife to save the fisherman from death. Then they are out in the ocean. (What??) Then there are huge great white sharks popping out of the water. Then a harpoon comes out of nowhere, as if they didn't see the huge pirate ship in front of them!! Then they're back on the island. The pirates tell the fisherfolk that they'll kill all the sharks in exchange for provisions. Then Kamui finds out that they are pirate-ninjas. Escaped ninjas like him. (God, give me a BReAK). Then Kamui finds the whole village has been poisoned and killed by the pirate-ninjas (the whole village killed to get at one person--very Japanese, BTW). Because they were actually still with the clan and the are targeting him. So then there is this fight to the death.

Matsuyama Kenichi as Kamui

Matsuyama looks great in this role, but there's something off about his attitude. He doesn't really bring out that sharp edge attitude when he's bringing it. His body caves in too much for a a guy who is supposed to have awesome ninja skill. His posture is like he's taking his dog for a walk on a rainy day. Perfect for playing Light in Death Note. God, he was so so good in that role. He made Light in the live action Death Note films.

Who would be a good actor choice for Kamui? I can't think of any Japanese actors off hand. Maybe somebody from Hong Kong. Jay Chou had more attitude driving a car in Initial D--that's for sure. His low-key sure smirk when he got behind the wheel, whew. That's what I'm talking about.

Watching it in a Theater:

The best part about watching this film was that I got to watch it in a theater with other people. Their comments made it a great show for me.

1. A guy in the audience: "Pirate-ninjas???" (WTF?)

2. The guys sitting next to me during the absurd shark scene: "He just elbowed the shark! Look at that! He just elbowed the shark!"

3. Sugaru warns Kamui to watch his back today. Fudo, the pirate leader, turns to Kamui and says, "I've got your back. Don't worry." Sections of the audience laugh incredulously. We know what Kamui can do. This guy is talking like he could actually protect Kamui in a fight.

4. Fudo threatens Kamui with his naginaga. Kamui doesn't flinch. Fudo says, "It looks like you've got some guts." The audience murmurs a laugh. You bet he does.

5. At the end of the movie, the two guys sitting next to me say to each other, "Woah, that was amazing!" I'm sitting here going, "What in that was amazing?" This is the mess we'd get if a blind man tried to assemble the train cars after a train wreck: random! And he forgot the engine, or stuck it in the middle so it's only pulling half the train.

An Amazing Part of Asian/Japanese Storytelling:

One thing many Asian and especially Japanese stories do is practically destroy the line between self and Shadow/other. In the final battle, Fudo says to Kamui, "You and I, we're the same. You've killed over 100 people haven't you. You'll never escape the ninja way of life." And Kamui proceeds to destroy him in the most gruesome, cruel fashion. Now I like that kind of deep irony.

What I Would Have Liked To Experience:

In the beginning of this film, the voiceover said, "Kamui learned the ninja way of life. He became very skilled. His only goal was to become the strongest. He couldn't trust anyone. His heart grew cold."

Sounds like good. In order to find his heart again, he decides to quit the ninja way of life and he cuts his way out of clan territory. I would have liked to see how Kamui's heart had grown cold, and how he felt about it. He's feeling something because he's at the line, he's running across it. I also would have liked them to stress this as his reason for doing what he was doing in the story. I know Japanese are lovers of understatement, and this can make subtley complex flavors of art, but motive/sentiment was completely absent in this film.
Also, the attraction between Sugaru and Kamui was hardly believable. She just popped out of the water one night and gave him a cool, symbolic shell. And the village was talking about them getting married. Why? Because they passed within 100 feet of each other?

Further, I didn't feel how Kamui could get so mad when the pirates killed the islandfolk except for the important fact that they were human. The relationships in this film were unbelivably shallow. I feel so disappointed. :Sigh:

The Skinny:
Kamui is a hack-um-up-forever movie. If you like Kill Bill, Versus, or the Princess Blade, this one will satisfy you. If you like stories with complexity, air-tight continuity, and deep relationships, then this film is definitely not for you.

Rani, the Queen comes to Dil Bole Hadippa at TIFF

On a much, much better note, I saw Rani today!!!@
She was here in Toronto for the WORLD PREMIERE of Dil Bole Hadippa. It's a nice movie. I must have been smiling through the whole thing. I realized that this was the first bollywood movie I'd seen on the big screen, AND I was watching it with a huge audience, on a big screen, with Rani, the Queen.
She signed my ticket. I didn't think I was an autograph person, but maybe it's taken me a while to find the right people. She was so radient and exquisite. I'm glad I came to this film festival. The director was there too! Wow, just WOW. This is quite a journey I'm going on. First Rani, and then the wolf movie coming up. Life is seredipitous like that. I smile at it sometimes.

Also, today when I went to the subway station, I took the wrong northbound train. I realized it and got off at the next stop. As I was going up the stairs to switch over to the other platform, a guy coming down made my heart sparkle. Thump to the front. Bang! I lost my breath. I kept going up the stairs. I got down to the opposite platform and I found myself stopping across from him. I wanted to shout across the gap, "Hi, how are you? What's your life like? Who are you? How about a date with me?" But I made myself keep going down the platform and away from him. Is there a word for the whole of someone? I mean, something like their manner, their energy, the way they carry themselves, their looks, their history, their right now, and their future? I'd have liked to get to know more of his story, of who he was.

There might be a fine line between sweet romance and instrusive voyeurism. Respect and care versus objectification and sick use of power is mostly the difference.

So I'm in Toronto for my first film festival!!
I haven't seen a film yet, but I've got a lot of good ones coming up, including Air Doll by Kore-eda and my personal favorite Kamui Gaiden.

I got to the box office early in the morning and there was hardly a line on this first day of the festival. Later in the afternoon, the line was snaking out into the plaza. I'm really glad I went early. I noticed that they pack the shows into the final 2 days, which I will be missing because I decided to come on the front end to get good tickets. If you can be here starting a day before the festival and leave a day after the festival, I highly reccomend that.

I took a double decker bus tour. It was really nice to feel the wind in my hair, but I think I got some mild sunburn and turned a little pink. I bought sunscreen for the rest of the festival. (Oh, if you ever come to Toronto and want to go on a bus tour, take Bus and Boat, they're spiffy, fast, on time, a boat ride is included for the same price of the company I'm using, and you get to use it for a whole week instead of three days.) It's a real deal I'll make it to Chinatown one of the days during the festival, and I also want to go to Little India. I'm DVD hunting.

I think if you can do it, and cheaply enough, it's probably worth getting a hotel in the TIFF area or a hotel near the TCC subway lines. It will make your whole TIFF weekend a breeze.

Now Toronto--is the most awesome metropolitan city I've *ever* been in. The diversity is astonishing, a real breath of fresh air. "Mixed couple" is practically an oxymoron here: it's so common that it's not worth having a term to point it out. Toronto is what I imagine a Sci-Fi city to be like, where there are no discernable minorities because of the nature of diaspora. There are so many white people where I went to college that it's like "white glare," so this diversity is relaxing to see.

And Toronto's restaurants! There are so many and so many different kinds! I could live here and really like it. It's a big city with a smaller town vibe.

I'm liking my journey to Toronto. I can't wait to see some films!

TIFF

Kaminey

Kaminey, SUX.
Shahid is a good actor.
I miss the gentleman Shahid, and I now wait in breathless anticipation for Dil Bole Hadippa! Shahid, Rani, Yash Raj, Punjabi music--I'm seeing stars!!

The White Dragon 小白龍情海翻波 (2004)

World Region: Hong Kong
Starring: Cecilia Cheung, Frances Ng, Andy On
Director: Wilson Yip (SPL: Sha Po Lang/Kill Zone)
Rating: 5.5/10
Visuals & Art Direction: 6
Creative wuxia comedy, witty anachronism

White Dragon is a fun film. I really liked Cecilia Cheung. The music and some of the gags are period-modern fusion, so in places this movie feels like A Knight's Tale. Some of this period fusion and playing with modern culture also reminds me of one of my all-time favorites, the Korean film The Duelist. I love this type of period-modern fusion because it gives the directors a full range of tools to pull the viewer in, including modern music that directly keys into our modern culturization.

In The White Dragon, the anachronistic gags are also great. I laughed so hard when Cecilia Cheung rocked her concert and then smashed her pipa-biwa to shreds at the end. I also loved the "power download" of a kung fu master's power. On broadband. ;P
I can't tell you how much I loved to see a woman in a strong role while not discarding her beauty and her own life. I want to become 小白龍!













(There a few dude jokes that made me go "ugg, please!") but overall The White Dragon is a fresh film that allows women to be in effective, active roles. This movie is sometimes reflective and endearing, and is always fun.

Butterfly Lovers 武俠梁祝 (2008)

World Region: Hong Kong
Starring: Wu Zun, Charlene Choi Cheuk-Yin
Action Director: Ching Siu-Tung
Rating: 4.5/10
Visuals & Art Direction:7

Butterfly Lovers is a beautiful movie. I felt so, so happy watching Zhu and Liang "Big Brother" falling in love in the beginning. High-ranking Zhu goes to a mountain martial arts training center where Liang has lived all his life. Zhu dresses as a boy so that she can go out into the world and start training at the mountain martial arts school.

Both Charlene Choi and Wu Zun are good actors, and both were a pleasure to watch. Choi sounds a little whiny at first, but she later unfurls her sophistication as the plot thickens. I love how Wu Zun thinks and feels things out with his eyes, like many people do in real life. His acting seems natural, lifelike, and subtly spunky to me.

The martial arts were surprisingly good and exciting. I haven't seen Wu Zun in his pretty boy dramas, but the man has got some serious Hong Kong wuxia moves. I can't wait to see more period and action films starring Wu Zun!

Oh! No wonder I liked the action sequences! Butterfly Lovers was coreographed by Ching Siu-Tung, the guy who does some of the most awesome work in HK action like A Chinese Ghost Story, My Schoolmate the Barbarian (Nic Tse), Hero, House of Flying Daggers, and Curse of the Golden Flower.



Unfortunately for my still Western tastes, this story is very similar to Romeo and Juliet. The butterfly lovers is a very popular story in China that has been written and produced in many variations. The two are lovers who met in heaven and have been cursed to go through ten unhappy incarnations together. It's a beautiful movie. The end is beautiful, but it is so bittersweet to me. I'm starting to expect most East Asian movies that focus mostly on romance to end in this tragic, bittersweet way. The essence of East Asian arts is often this bittersweet beauty.

To my Western culturization, bittersweet beauty hurts and it seems like fatalism. I'm like, "Why does the more powerful guy always screw things up and kill one of the main characters in the last three minutes of the film? Why can't they just live together and be happy for once?! My god, it's a match made in heaven, no, a match made in heaven for ten lives!" I want to feel saccharine fuzzy by the very end, not that wrenching bittersweet tug all the way to the credits.

I guess I really don't have a sense of next incarnations. That would help a lot. Because they will be happy in their next incarnation for a while. And does it really matter if they live or die? Because they loved each other deeply, and even a second of that is wonderful. On the other hand, strangely (but right on for traditional Asian culture), the bittersweetness and tragicness of romantic love in Asian movies seems to be saying that romantic love makes people do stupid things. Too much attachment maybe?

Butterfly Lovers is a beautiful, delightfully romantic film. If you watch it, just prepare yourself for the usual fare of bittersweet candy. I think this is the kind of movie that grows on you. I ended up writing a lot more about it than I was planning. Recommended.

Initial D Live Action 頭文字D (2005)

World Region: Hong Kong
Starring: Jay Chou, Edison Chen, Anne Suzuki
Rating: 7/10
Music Innovation: 8
Good fun and great music plus Jay Chou

This is the live action version of Initial D, which is a manga series and anime in Japan. I have not read the manga, so I was watching this fresh. For this rendition, a Hong Kong production crew led by the amazing Andy Lau took it on and did a surprisingly good job. They added a lot of nice Japanese touches like a Jizo statue on the side of the drift road, techno-house pieces that use tradional Japanese vocals with rap, the things Tatsuki's dad sees when he gets drunk, geta at home, and shoji doors.

The best thing about this movie is the music. It's a swinging and creative and emotional mix that really adds to the movie. There's low-key flow rap paired with sunrises, pinging techno-rap for race scenes, and warm-fuzzy vocals and gentle traditional Chinese string instruments for romantic scenes. The sound editors have mixed some fresh techno-house/rap by the HK group Ghost Style for car scenes with soothing piano and flutes for softer scenes. They add in some stylish and breathtaking feminine vocals into some of their downbeat grooves. These guys have also added taiko drums on the front end of some of their techno racing songs, and the effect just makes my heart race. Overall, words that come to mind when I think about Ghost Style in Initial D are "tasty fresh" and "innovative." Kinson Tsang King-Cheung, who lead sound production for this film, won the award for best sound direction at the 25th Hong Kong Awards.

There is a short segment of candy laden electronica, "A Racer's Dream (飄移世界)," that was so nice and simple that it made me go, "Oh so this is life. Take it easy and everything is okay and happy. Pay attention to the small things." One of my favorite tracks is the smooth, swingin' "Gloves 2 Ali (豆腐宅急便)." One of the other songs I love, "Tanning in the Sunray (沙灘戀曲)," is used for a cute romantic scene. It has a clean, sparkling warm electric piano intro that flows into gentle orchestrals in the background with sunny, soothing lyrics.

Okay, I love the music. I also really like Jay Chou. He was a perfect pick to play Takumi, the low-key, cool-headed tofu delivery guy who learns how to drift because he wants to deliver the tofu as fast as he can. The story is good fun, and I really like it. Takumi probably doesn't know what "touge 峠" (drifting) is, but that's exactly what he does in his beloved AE86. And he does it better than the pros in their high-powered, tricked out cars. Takumi is the underdog, the ghost rider who comes out of nowhere and coolly blows everyone away. Jay Chou is great for this role with his "Mmhmm, okay, but watch this" kind of style. He's also an endearing low-key, love-struck sweetie when he's with his girlfriend. Initial D is a movie that was so good it surprised me since I wasn't expecting much from a HK remake of a popular Japanese manga. Recommended for lovers of sound and Jay Chou fans.

Duelist, 형사, 刑事 (2005)

Movie: Duelist, 형사, 刑事 (2005)
World Region: Korea
Starring: Ha Ji-Won, Kang Dong-Won
Rating: 9/10
Visuals & Art Direction:10
Innovative Choreography: 10
Music Innovation: 9.5
Innovative Korean Fantasy Art Film

Plot: Namsoon, a detective for the government, is investigating a serious case of counterfit money. She's got a refreshing fiery attitude and combat skills to match. Sad Eyes is attached to Defense Minister Song as a shadow warrior. Sad Eyes's skill with a sword is breathtakingly beautiful. The counterfit money causes rampant inflation, plunging the country into turmoil. Namsoon suspects Song is behind the turmoil. Sad Eyes seems to owe a blood debt to Song and has worked for him for a very long time. Namsoon and Sad Eyes start to fall in love, but circumstances make it nearly impossible for their love to bloom and thrive. Really, the plot feels like a background for this film's unprecedented art and style that express normally subtle emotions so very well.


The stylized sword fights are exqisite art in themselves. Beautiful silent spaces are cleared for artistic style. In this film, there is a sword fight stylized as a passionate dance that is ineffably breathtaking. This is one "fight" that will go down in niche film history as a legend in itself.








The sound is superb and innovative just like the other parts of this movie. The music is a creative and fitting mix of all different, mostly modern, styles. For example, the director chose an upbeat techno rock track for a scene of an infiltration mission at the Defense Minister's mansion. It surprisingly fits well in this period fantasy film. Or the director chose a French-Parisian sounding theme for a stunning art sword montage. During one fight scene, the sound effects of breathing and whipcording with each breath is invigoratingly expressive. Excellent choices and placement of SFX and music make watching this film a complete, ethereal experience. Some numbers on the soundtrack are haunting, drawing out the bittersweetness so skillfully that it feels like a stinging, weeping cut.

The director really seems to appreciate the beauty and import of silences so well. There was a scene between Sad Eyes and Song's eyes. They don't say a thing but, oh god do they express more than all the words in the world!

This is a flow movie--snapshots really pale at doing it justice. The fades are great, the camera angles rock, overlays are poignant, and everything feels innovative and fresh.

**Spoilers Follow**
It took me a while--actually two times of watching this--to figure out what was going on with Sad Eyes, to figure out why this movie tasted so hauntingly bittersweet. Song took Sad Eyes under his care at a very young age and tought him to use a sword. Sad Eyes works for Song because of this debt, and this film is partly about how Sad Eyes is trying to break free from Song. Sad Eyes thinks that Song has caused the turmoil for his own profit, and I agree. It gets harder and harder for Sad Eyes to work for Song because even though Song does say he loved Sad Eyes like a son, he keeps Sad Eyes under his thumb, on a really short leash as his deadly errand boy. And Song never calls Sad Eyes by his real name.Sad Eyes decides he has had enough of Song, especially after he and Namsoon have met. He doesn't quite bring himself to kill the one man in the world he knows as "father," but in his own small ways he manages to bring Song's downfall. In doing this, he manages to break himself free from constricting circumstance and rotting ties--sometimes a little is a lot, but I was left with the feeling that it wasn't enough. Maybe that's for a sequel, or what the viewer creates in their imagination after the credits roll.

There was a quiet scene overflowing with emotional energy where Sad Eyes is targeting Song, and he actually passes Song the Japanese sword:
Song: "Was it you?"
Sad Eyes: "Yes."
"It's been a long time since I called you by your name."
"Your name is...."
"My name is..."
"My name is..."
"What did you say your name was?
"My name is..."

I can't tell you how much I wanted him to say his name. I'm feeling this constricting pain in my chest, like, "Say it man! Declare yourself!" I wanted him to say his own name then slice Song down to the quick. But there's my crude Western sensibility trying to use a low-yeild tactical nuke when a skillful hand with a needle works all the same. Sad Eyes makes it possible for the law to bring justice to Song. Sad Eyes freed himself through small acts that had a huge ripple effect. He knew there were other ways than using his sword to free himself. And the man is an artist with his sword.

The way this film portrays the star-crossed love between Namsoon and Sad Eyes is stunning. Again, the director uses silences to make the viewer's heart cry along with the characters. There are some scenes where I can just seen how much Sad Eyes is hurting because of circumstances that have bound him to one man, to one house. And in the same moment, I can see how much he wants to break free and go to be with Namsoon.

The director used a stylized red fade out to make it look like Sad Eyes died. And maybe he did. Maybe the flat Sad Eyes who wore black died and was reborn the moment he said, "Yes, it was me." In the moment he passed Namsoon Song's accounting book, in the moment he started to declare himself. Because he came back wearing a bright red hakch'angui full of energy and movement.

Namsoon thought she had lost him because they didn't get together after the counterfiting incident ended. The director and Namsoon's actress painted a superb picture of bittersweetness through her heartwrending torment after she assumed Sad Eyes had died. The viewer is nearly left not sure of whether he's still around or not since the end of the movie is seen through Namsoon's perspective. But they met up once or twice. And they danced together in their very own special way. I think that highlighting this bittersweetness draws the view into feeling the pangs of circumstances, circumstances that have so far made it very difficult for Namsoon and "Sad Eye's" love to blossom. But bittersweetneess moves people to change. I think Sad Eyes freed himself from Song and went off to find his own name. So there was a year or so where he was gone from the capital and Namsoon still lives. But he comes back. With a new, freer energy and that same sweet smile. She's kept his gift. She's been waiting and hoping. I'm sure that now their love will have a chance to bloom.

Kaminay Teaser Trailer

I just watched the teaser trailer for Kaminay, starring Shahid and Priyanka. Kaminay is scheduled for release on March 27, 2009. There have been rumors of Shahid changing his image and his physique for this film. I have been skeptical of this move, what he calls "taking off his shirt if a film requires it." Work ethic, riight.

You all know what comes to mind:
Shahrukh in Om Shanti Om. (A grasping attempt to hang on to the under-40 side of the industry with that now infamous flash of sixpack abs in Om Shanti Om. I respect your acting, yaar, but showcase your age with dignity. Like in Paheli or in Kal Ho Naa Ho).
Aamir in Ghajini.
John Abraham in Dostanta.
Hirthik.
Ranbir Kapoor in Sawaariya. (He practically used abs in his debut to get noticed. He was.)

And now, the wonderful, romantic guy next door is bending to the winds of 2008 by making himself look physically stronger. This craze in bollywood has gained the name "abs war," and Shahid has thrown himself into the fray. He's lost by joining in.

Remember this shot in Krrish of Hirthik running faster than his white horse accompanied by closeups of Hirthik's body parts?


Now look:Wow! Four horses. And a full body shot. Shahid, you dolt!
I laughed pretty hard at the absurdity and the media baggage propelling this scene along.
Shahid is always lovable, but...the best part has always been that he isn't like everyone else!! His strong points are that he has shown what counts is on the inside: care, partnership, perceptiveness, respect, humor, sensitivity.

And he doesn't have to show it off for us to know that he's got it. If you've seen Fida, you know what I mean. Understatement is so endearing and attractive.

I can understand Shahid's desire not to get typecast, but with his body makeover in Kaminay, he's given up some part of his endearing side by trying to fit into the trendy mold. The industry's a rat race, I know. But Shahid has never before allowed himself to become one of the rats. He has always been the elegant, playful love bird singing his own tune.

I enjoy seeing Shahid in new roles, but I say that he doesn't have to remake his body to be noticed. He gets notice because of his smile. Because of the way he connects with the co-stars with his eyes and his voice. And because of his rocking dance moves--the way he seems to enjoy dancing so much. I love him because of who he is (on screen at least), not becuase of how his body looks.

Vampire Effect

Film: Vampire Effect, aka The Twins Effect (2003)
World Region: Hong Kong
Rating: 2/10 why: because it's a showpiece for the cantopop duo The Twins and nothing more

I was really watching this because I was thinking that Nic Tse was in it as the main character (or at least had a cameo), but in fact Ekin Cheng had that part. I was really excited at first to see vampires and vampire hunters doing some movie kung fu, but then the crappy special effects turned cool into hilarious. I also was really hoping that the vampire prince would pull some weight, but he certainly failed to deliver. This movie was really a focus on the two main girls who are cantopop stars. I like to see women kick butt in a movie, but I'd much rather see the Vampire Prince kicking ass and taking names. Ekin Cheng as the vampire prince was just a cute face and his most memorable line was, "I guess I suck at being a vampire." Yeah, you do. And you don't do enough sucking as it is, man--blood is in your face and you're like "doo-di-doo, I am weak." I always love the progressive vampire, but old habits usually die hard. And weak vampires die first.

Jackie Chan was is this movie, surprisingly enough. Other than a few of his stunts, the kung fu was horrible and uniteresting. The whole thing is so hack that it's funny. I am a vampire lore afficianado, and this is actually the part of the story that I found seriously lacking. It feels to me that somebody thought "vampires have big teeth, run around in the dark, and are fast and strong." Um, yeah. But they forgot the part about hierarchy and power in Vampire lore. They forgot the part about allure that a vampire prince should have over his people if he so chooses. And most importantly, they forgot the part that a vampire prince does not survive long unless he has true power or exceptional savvy. They forgot that when a vampire prince is hungry and slipping in and out and then he sees blood, he will drink it. But no, he just lays around on the floor multiple times when there is plenty of blood within arm's reach. God, this movie could have been awesome if they had really used what is available to them in Vampire lore. But I can see what happened--this movie is actually just a showpiece for the two girls who are the Cantopop duo called the Twins. So they got what they came for and I came out with nothing but delusions of grandure.

I would really love to see this movie redone with darker overtones, a heartwarming bonechiller by Tsui Hark (without the absurdity, but with his camera angles and reflective style) starring a bad ass Nic Tse who has this amazing ability to be hard-hitting and cute at the same time. Now that would be heaven. Whoo!

Appleseed (2005)

Country: Japan
Style: Computer Animation
Rating: 3/10 (story) 6/10 (graphics)

Good graphics, but a bad mishmash of countless other common themes. It's a crash-and-burn mix of movies like Tomb Raider, Ghost in the Shell, and a lackluster apocalyptic flick. If you're looking for something good in this area, go for the stars in this genre--Ghost in the Shell and KARAS.

My Schoolmate, The Barbarian

Time and Tide (2000)

Movie: Time and Tide 順流逆流 (2000)
World Region: Hong Kong
Starring: Nicholas Tse and Wu Bai
Rating: 4.5/10

Plot: I can't really figure it out. Something about a one night stand, bodyguards, lots of money, guys from South America, and babies (being born in the middle of a gun battle!). The best part is Nicholas Tse's existential voiceovers. The first twenty minutes of his witty, perceptive voiceovers were the best part of the movie. The filmography is creative and flavorful. Should you watch it? I don't know...if you like genre mishmash and absurdity then go for it. I've definitely seen better movies.

New Police Story (2004)

Movie: New Police Story 新警察故事 (2004)
World Region: Hong Kong
Starring: Jackie Chan and Nicholas Tse
Rating: 6/10

Plot: Inspector Chan Kwok Wing (Jackie Chan) is weighed down with regret for a mission that he botched at the beginning of the movie. He is suspended for a year and becomes an alcoholic. Frank Cheng (Nicholas Tse), who identifies himself as an inspector, comes along and pulls Cheng back onto his feet. Frank doesn't want to see Cheng waste away under the pain of regret. Nicholas Tse does some great "under"-acting to make Frank the best character in this movie--watch him in the backgrounds 'cause he's always right on. He's smart, rakish-cute, a bit cocky, and pretty damn good when it comes to action scenes.

It's not hard-hitting MA like I was hoping, but the acting and stunts were good. Some scenes were suspenseful and there was a surprising little twist of sunshine about life at the end. You may have to watch it twice because the last few minutes are so illuminating. New Police Story, though nothing special, is a pretty good movie.

Gen-X Cops

Movie: Gen-X Cops (1999)
World Region: Hong Kong
Starring: Nicholas Tse and others
Rating: 5.5/10

Plot: Um....I watched it last night...I should be able to remember....Anyway, there are three guys who are about to get kicked out of the police force for insubordination and for being waay too smart in the wrong way at the academy. They are picked up by a down and out inspector to crack a high-profile case by infiltrating a gang. Sometimes it's hard to tell whether they're police or losers, but that's exactly what they've got going for them. It feels like that movie The Perfect Score (2004) that everybody watched and forgot mixed with something like a weak Kill Zone.

This is a fun film with a bunch of newer guys in Hong Kong entertainment. The best part is the way the team of three undercover cop guys play off of each other. Nicholas Tse does some good acting in this one. Sam Lee as Alien is special in his own way and kinda adorable. Nakamura Toru as Akatora says little but carries himself very well. Sure, there's better out there, but the gags in this one are cute to funny and they are what carries the show.

Parineeta

Starring: Saif Ali Khan, Vidya Balan
Music Director: Shantanu Moitra
Singers: Shreya Ghoshal, Sonu Nigam
Favorite Songs: Hui Main Parineeta, Kasto Mazza, Piyu Bole, Raat Hamari Toh
Story: 7/10 Music: 7/10 Picturizations: 6/10

This is a beautiful film and the plot is frequently gripping. Saif and Vidya both give gripping performances. A rich guy and the girl next door fall in love but face the machinations of the rich guy's money-obsessed businessman father. The music is high-quality too, since it was sung by my favorite singer, Shreya Ghoshal. The picturizations are toned down but still beautiful. My favorite scenes were the Hui Main Parineeta one and the one with Saif talking to his father near the end. Recommended.

Rocky: The Rebel (2006)

Starring: Zayed Khan
Music: Himesh Reshammiya
Favorite Songs: My Love For You, Junoon Junoon
Story: 5/10 Music: 6/10 Picturizations: 4/10

This film was good fun. Some parts were extreme and nearly laughable. I really enjoyed the plot parts about Rocky going up against the mob even though the police and his father are stuck in a corrupt system. I think Zayed is cute and that's pretty much why I decided to watch this film that flopped in the box office. Reccomended only if you really wanna see Zayed or are very interested in busting corrupt systems through individual fire.

Nozomi's Favorites 2007

Here's a review of my favorite Bollywood films so far. My favorite Bollywood films usually deal with working through the problems of marriage to find stronger love. I also like films that deal with the religious and political conflicts in South Asia. I watch Bollywood films mostly for the music and the picturizations, but I fall in love with the ones that also have a heart-wrenching plot. 99% of the movies I've seen so far are made after 2000.

Nozomi's Favorite Bollywood Films (2007):
1. Kabhi Alvida Naa Kehna
2. Vivah (Though it's not a classic, it was the first time I met a classic Bollywood storyline. I love Shahid, the music, and the cute story)
3. Rang De Basanti
4. Fanaa
5. Salaam Namaste

Other favorites: Jab We Met, Saathyia, Kal Ho Na Ho

Films I'm Looking Forward To:
Thoda Pyaar Thoda Magic, Kismat Konnection, Milenge Milenge

Favorite Music Directors (modern-classical fusion typified by Shankar-Ehsaan-Loy) :
1. Shankar-Ehsaan-Loy
2. Himesh Reshammiya
3. A.R. Rahman
4. Pritam

Favorite Playback Singers:
1. Shreya Ghoshal
2. Udit Narayan

Favorite Directors:
1. Karan Johar
2. Kunal Kohli

Actors
My Favorite (aka, if he is in them, I will watch it no matter how horrible the story is): Shahid Kapoor
Best Technical Actor: Aamir Khan
Best Emotional Actor: Shahrukh Khan
Most Promising Upcoming Actor: Shahid Kapoor, Saif Ali Khan
Cutest Lead & Best Dancer: Shahid Kapoor

Actresses (Technical Skill)
1. Rani Mukerji, the Queen
2. Kajol

Kabul Express

Starring: John Abraham, Arshad Warsi, Salman Shahid
Story: Kabir Khan
Story: 6.5/10 Music: Soundtrack only, hip techno tracks mixed with vocals

Two reporters go to Afghanistan after 9/11 to get an interview with the Taliban. They get hijacked by a member of the Taliban who forces them to drive towards the Pakistani border. Things aren't as simple as they seem, and enemies might become friends.

John Abraham is a bit of eye candy, and he's a good enough actor. The American actress is a nobody, and it's obvious that she wasn't hired for her acting skills. The guy who plays the Taliban soldier is the best actor in this movie. There were no musical scenes or picturizations in this film, but that's actually better because of the subject and content.

The best thing about this film is it's subject matter--life in Afghanistan after America busted in and screwed up like soldiers playing hero. I absolutely love to see criticism of America from people who live in the region. Basically: The Taliban was supported by Pakistan until America paid Pakistan more money than the Taliban could. Some Pakistani soldiers even fought in the Taliban until Pakistan sold itself out to America. America's foreign policy is based on one thing: MONEY, Paise. American policy makers use their greenbacks to buy bombs, fickle alliances, and oil. Oil is sucked out, coke is poured in. Pas.

I'm American, and I love this movie. I also liked Turtles Can Fly, a 2004 film written and directed by the Kurdish filmmaker from Iran Bahman Ghobadi and the 2001 film Kandahar. These are special because they are films by local directors who want to show the world the state of modern life in the Middle East. If you like these films, I also recommend one of my favorite American movies, Three Kings with George Clooney, Mark Wahlberg, Ice Cube, and Spike Jones.

If you are looking for John Abraham to show his stuff, this is definitely not for you. If you are interested in the state of the Post-Cold War Middle East, then Kabul Express is for you. Recommended.

Dus (2005): The Feature Film that Gave Us a Music Video

Starring: Zayed Khan, Abhishek Bachchan, Sanjay Dutt, Sunil Shetty
Music: Vishal-Shekhar
Story: 4/10 Music: 2/10 (except for the major hit "Dus Bahane")

It's about counter-terrorism. Zayed is really cute and often hot. Abhishek wasn't given a lot to do, and he has done a lot better before. If you really like Bollywood action movies, then you'll probably like this one. Dhoom was way better because it had rocking music. Dus is notable for it's single hit "Dus Bahane" which has absolutely nothing to do with the plot but it does rock. Skip Dus, watch Dhoom and the music video "Dus Bahane".

Dil Se

Starring: Shahrukh Khan, Manisha Koirala
Music: A.R. Rahman
Story: 8/10 Music: 8/10 Picturizations: 9/10

Dil Se is subliminal. While watching it, I wanted to keep taking huge breaths but the air was stopped in my throat. Wonderful! The picturizations are shockingly beautiful and weird. The music is classic, too. The picturization of "Satrangi Re" is my number one favorite in this movie followed by the music of "Chaiyya Chaiyya". The story of Dil Se asks the question "who is a terrorist and especially why?" Does Meghna love to kill or will she die for love? Recommended.

Bunty Aur Babli

Starring: Rani Mukerji, Abhishek Bachchan, Amitabh Bachchan
Music: Shankar-Ehsaan-Loy
Story: 7.5/10 Music: 9/10

This film is really great fun, and the music is amazing. Shankar-Ehsaan-Loy always give a fun and beautiful soundtrack. The picturizations and camera work is great, too. The whole thing turned out to be so much more interesting and fun than I thought it was going to be. Recommended!

Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam

Starring: Aishwarya Rai, Salman Khan, Ajay Devgan
Story: 4/10 Music: 6/10

Many people love this movie because of it's support of traditional values and beautiful presentation. Rai plays a character who doesn't seem to know what she wants--she's madly in love with her lover and then she traipses around the world with her husband who she feels nothing for and is suddenly like, "oops, I think I love you instead." It's good to be able to fall in love after you get married in an arranged marriage, but this whole thing just seems so haphazard and fickle. But maybe that's love, he?

The one area where this film excels in the art and art direction. This movie is classically beautiful. I get the feeling that it is old royal style or an even more modern DDLJ. The camera angles, colors, and costumes are real art.